When the schedule of Simi Valley's Cajun & Blues Fest published a special time slot for the national anthem, the emphasis seemed appropriate to this historical moment. The music festival occurred during Memorial Day weekend. And given the event's theme, it was right to honor the flag of a nation that, for 86 years after its founding, sanctioned the institution of slavery. Without slavery, New Orleans, capital of both Cajun music and the slave trade, would never have thrived. And without slavery, there would have been no field hollers, the origin of the blues. One must salute that.
Festival organizers clearly wished to support the National Football League's new ruling that players cannot protest social injustice by kneeling during the national anthem. It stands to reason that personal expressions, especially expressions of compassion, are not appropriate at public events. We can only hope that this policy will be logically extended to similar situations.
* Professional athletes should not wear pink ribbons supporting breast-cancer awareness. If God did not want women to have breast cancer, He would not have created it.
* Athletes should not wear black armbands when an important person dies. Death is one of our most important institutions, and no opposition should be shown toward it.
* Oil companies and banks should not make charitable donations in association with golf tournaments. Such actions distract from corporations' time-honored devotion to polluting, stealing and keeping America first. Or at least keeping .0001 percent of Americans first.
* Athletes should not point to the sky when they score, or endorse Jesus in interviews. God is not their sugar daddy.
* Athletes should not wear gold chains on the field. We already know they are rich douchebags.
* Athletes should not adopt hideous hairstyles. We already know they have bad taste.
* Athletes should not grow big hillbilly beards. We already know they are ugly.
* There are many more examples, but the greatest benefit could be achieved by jettisoning fighter-plane fly-overs, tributes to war veterans, Fourth of July fireworks and other patriotic displays from sporting events. Yes, this would include omitting the national anthem, a tradition that will see its 100th anniversary on September 5 of this year. If we want to diminish controversies around the respect due the flag, we only need to eliminate the anthem from occasions that may have something to do with National Leagues, but have nothing to do with nationalism. Mission accomplished.